As high schoolers, we have known many people around us for years and have developed close friendships with most of them. When teenagers enter high school, the next few years are spent going through changes hormonally, mentally, physically, and socially. Close friends are bound to develop feelings for each other. The question is whether it is best to tell your best friend how you feel or if confessing your feelings ruins a perfectly good friendship.
I ran a student survey to find out how many teens have experienced this. The survey found that 80% of Coral Glades students have had feelings for their best friend and 66.7% confessed their feelings but many reported that their friend had undecided feelings or didn’t feel the same way. A majority of the students were females.
As a female, I understand how a crush could develop on someone you are close friends with. As you get older your feelings change and so do your hormones. You start finding people attractive that you didn’t think were attractive before, and when you have a close friendship with someone and constantly talk to them, your feelings start to grow stronger and you start to view them as more than a friend. Working up the courage to confess to your best friend is easier said than done.
On one hand, you feel like they should know about your feelings hoping that maybe they feel the same, but on the other hand, the feeling of rejection especially from someone you have developed a close platonic friendship with is hard not only for you experiencing the rejection, but also for the other person as they will have to break the heart of someone they have come to care about.
However, should you risk your friendship for the sake of your feelings? 68.8% of students said that confessing to their best friend did not ruin their friendship but there is a strong chance that it wouldn’t be the same as before. Knowing that you have feelings for someone who does not feel the same could make talking about things awkward.
One student who would like to remain anonymous said, “We started dating because he felt the same way, but after three months, we broke up. Now we’ve been on and off ever since, and our friendship will never be the same. because we now barely see each other as friends and more as first loves.” This student is an example of how being in a relationship with someone you’re friends with can strengthen your bond with that person, but the friendship you once had with them will turn into something more and will never be the same.
Another anonymous student said that their best friend responded by saying, “I’ve been thinking a lot about this, and I really care about our friendship, so I want to be honest with you. I don’t feel the same way, and I hope that doesn’t hurt too much to hear. You mean so much to me as my best friend, and I don’t want to lose that connection between us. I hope we can still be close and figure this out together.” This response is one of the best ways to respond to your friend if you do not feel the same. Their answer was well thought out and although it may have been hard to hear it was not harsh and honestly voiced their feelings to the other person.
Overall confessing your feelings to your best friend is not easy to do and the choice is yours if you want to risk losing that person as a friend, but at the end of the day teenagers most likely will catch feelings for their best friend and if those feelings are the determining factor of the end of your friendship maybe it wasn’t all that strong to begin with.
